13 Biggest Surprises in Being a New Parent

Embarking on the journey of parenthood often comes with unforeseen challenges and delightful surprises. This article delves into the real-world experiences and sage advice from seasoned experts to guide new parents through the intricate dance of raising a child. Gain invaluable insights on navigating the complexities of parenting, from trusting instincts to appreciating the beauty of transformation.

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Parenthood Prompts Self-Examination

I truly thought parenting would be intuitive and come naturally. I was a former preschool teacher and had extensive knowledge of child development. I was good with kids and couldn’t wait to be a mom. What else was there? Turns out a lot.

It wouldn’t be until years after my first was born that I’d be able to articulate it in this way—becoming a parent shines a light on every part of you. Every wound. Every insecurity. Every fear. It calls us into a self-examination whether we like it or not.

As an anxious perfectionist, motherhood pulled me into postpartum depression and anxiety. It was the catalyst for my first experience with talk therapy. Something that changed my life by changing my relationship with myself. I became consciously aware of the impact my own upbringing was having on me as an adult and, most importantly, a parent.

The awareness was the first step. After that came a commitment to do things differently than how I was raised. The thing is, commitment isn’t always enough. We can’t will ourselves into change. I learned that we have to go about the work over time. Like building a muscle rep after rep. This happened through learning attachment theory and nervous system regulation techniques. Slowly, I became the embodiment of exactly the kind of parent I want to be.

Rachael Fritz
Parenting Coach, Parenting on Mars